…the latest in celebrity optometrical equipment. Get your eye air puff test while listening to Puff Daddy’s entire musical catalogue today! It can’t stop, won’t stop!
I have a knack for bad puns and living that Illionaire life. I don’t always get sick, but when I do, I use it as an opportunity to parody slogans. Dos Equis: 0, Corona: 1. Don’t stay thirsty my friends. Drink plenty of fluids, stay home, and rest.
Introducing Drizzyland, the first bemusement park to open on Antarctica. Take a Nonstop ride on Drake Passage to get there. Fulfill all your Wants and Needs today!
In a last ditch Hail Mary to acquire and retain subscribers, Netflix unveiled its newest service, Binge, a dating app for the “Netflix and Chill” crowd. Netflix’s proprietary algorithms will recommend personalized programming and other subscribers that are DTF after watching similar programming. Subscriptions start at $99.99 per month.
Phlegminem’s latest LP, “House of Chest Pain,” is going viral with these bangers. Licensed To Pill Spitting Up Spherics Homie I’ll Wet Ya Motherfucka I’m Ill, Not Sick And I’m Okay, But My Hack Sick Ill Ya Ya Ooze Yourself The Real Grim Plaguey My Neck, My Back, I’m Sick So Cut Me Some SlackContinue reading “Introducing Phlegminem”
Snoop Dogg serving up CALzone Broadus, the latest in Celebrity microwaveable turnovers. Available at all grocery stores and marijuana dispensaries not near you.
Smash course rules everything around me. S.C.R.E.A.M. gets the honey. Holler, holler thrills ya’ll. Woo-Mann Clan ain’t nothing to fuck with!
Introducing Snoop Dogg’s latest cryptocurrency you can use to buy his wine and weed among other things. Dogecoin and Elon Musk better watch out.
The elusive Annieconda is a one-eyed snake that lives in the wilds of the Pantaloonia. These hardy creatures can survive in the harshest of environments and get around quite a bit. Herpestologists have learned that they don’t want none unless you got puns, hun. These anniemals are quite alluring in their natural habitat, but underContinue reading “Anniemal Planet Episode 1: The Annieconda”
The latest in celebrity cryptocurrency brought to you by Kimye. Turn your gold into worthless coin in no time!